Friday, November 1, 2013

So now, I officially live above a weirdo that looks like a police sketch.

I semi-recently moved out on my own without any roommates.  I haven't lived at my parents house since high school (a couple summers and a few months stint after college notwithstanding), but I have never lived completely alone.  Overall, I love it.  Everything is mine.  I can walk around with no pants on, leave it a mess, and not worry about bothering anyone else.

Sort of.

When I moved in, there was no one living below me.  Within the month, someone moved in and a week or so later there was this note on my door.


I didn't think it was creepy at first.  I thought he was being considerate about making noise (that I didn't even hear) but then came the watermelon.

He left watermelon.  On my door step.  At 10 p.m.  Without knocking.  Days after noting a problem with cockroaches.  GREAT.  There was a note with that one too but I don't really remember what it said.  I'm pretty sure it mentioned being creepy.  Not a good start.

I began to think this was getting weird.  I mean, who leaves food on a doorstep without knocking and without ever talking to the person?

Another day, he opened my mail and then taped it to my door.  

He decorated for Halloween on September first by taping plastic bugs all over the place but then un-decorated on October 25th.  I guess he couldn't handle that extra week of decor.

BUT!  It gets better.  Worse?  I don't know.  I had my first interactions with "Roman #5" last Friday.  He ran out of his apartment to ask me if I was okay while I was carrying my laundry at 8:30 p.m.  [side note: I told you I always clean on Fridays]  Then, at 10:15 p.m. I hear a knock on the door.  

It's Roman.  He is going to CVS and wanted to know if I wanted anything.  Nope.  Nope.com.  I was thoroughly weirded out but then I realized he probably heard me coughing (I have been sick) and figured he could get me something?  I don't know.  Either way, it wasn't happening.  I was super creeped out.

The next morning I got up early to pick up Nancy from the airport (Yay for surprising people!) and I saw a Target bag by my driver's door.  Roman parks on the passenger side so I assumed the bag must have been accidentally dropped by my other neighbor.

Nope.

Inside was a note that said "Please Except." and had a casserole dish with bread and soup.  It was ice cold.  He had left me soup sometime in the middle of the night and now it was nearly frozen.  I quickly looked to see if he was watching me and then put it back and left.  I was not going to "except" this murder-soup.  It was gone from the parking lot by the time I got back.

Now I feel like I'm biding my time and just waiting my next creepy interaction.  I can't decide if he is just nice but lacks social skills or if I should invest in pepper spray and teach my cat karate.

Thoughts?